LAPD Violently Shoves Beloved Childhood Icon Jodie Sweetin To Ground As She Fights For Reproductive…
4:34pm By Robyn PennacchiaFor three days in a row, abortion rights protestors have marched in Los Angeles, protesting the Supreme Court's overturning of Roe v. Wade. During the march on Saturday, LAPD officers decided to confront the nonviolent, peaceful protesters, and video appears…Sunday Shows Highlight Both Sides Of Roe's Demise, Because Sunday Shows Bad At Journalism
3:46pm By Michael MoraThere have been many evil reactions since the illegitimate Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade. And there have been some good ones!Let's take a look at some of both from this week's Sunday shows. Gov. Asa Hutchinson and Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez on NBC's…CO Election Clerk Tina Peters Knows Election Was Stolen, She Don't Need No Stinkin' Evidence
3:19pm By Liz DyeThere's no better avatar for the way Donald Trump's Big Lie has screwed our (already screwed up) electoral system than Tina Peters, the former Mesa County, Colorado, elections clerk.“The Russians can’t hack into and start casting votes for someone,” she…Elizabeth Warren Has Some Badass Plans To Save America From Robed Tyrants
2:29pm By Stephen RobinsonElizabeth Warren has plans. That’s what we liked about her 2020 presidential run. Now, the Massachusetts Democratic senator has outlined plans of attack after the Supreme Court seized possession of American uteruses. Friday, after Dobbs dropped, Warren…Company That Wants To Buy Trump's Truth Social Getting So Many Subpoenas It's Gonna Get Sick Of ...…
1:36pm By Liz DyeIt's been a rough week over at Truth Social, Donald Trump's trash fire Twitter knockoff social media platform. The entire purpose of this exercise is to take the site's parent company, Trump Media and Technology Group, public, by merging it with Digital World…SCOTUS: School Prayer Awesome, Establishment Clause For Decorative Purposes Only
12:42pm By Robyn PennacchiaWe are hurtling toward theocracy at a dizzying speed. Last week, the Supreme Court ruled that religious schools could receive public funds — as in, the state must take money from everyone and give it to religious schools so they can teach kids Jesus hung out…Are Voters Gonna Show Supreme Court Who’s Really Boss?
11:28am By Stephen RobinsonIt seems most Americans aren’t keen on our Robed Masters stripping away our rights. According to a new Marist poll, 56 percent of voters oppose the Supreme Court’s decision to overturn Roe v. Wade. A whopping 88 percent of Democrats and 53 percent of…Josh Hawley Delivers Gloating Supervillain Monologue About Roe-Free GOP-Dominated America
10:39am By Stephen RobinsonSince 1992, Democrats have won more votes in every presidential election except for 2004 (quite the asterisk there, John Kerry). The three most recent conservative Supreme Court justices were nominated by a president who lost the popular vote, and were…Man’s Hand Barely Survives Touching Rudy Giuliani’s Back
10:05am By Stephen RobinsonFamous coup plotter Rudy Giuliani claims he was brutally assaulted Sunday in a Staten Island, New York, ShopRite store. Giuliani was campaigning for his useless son, Andrew, who thinks he can win the GOP nomination for governor. According to police, a…West Coast Govs Stand United Against Anti-Abortion Tyranny
9:35am By Stephen RobinsonElected officials in what remains of American democracy are actively resisting our Robed Masters. After the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade Friday, the Democratic governors of California, Washington and Oregon launched a “West Coast Offense” to…Does Sarah Huckabee Want People To Shoot Fetuses With AK-47s?
9:00am By Robyn PennacchiaIn a recently publicized clip from after she won her GOP gubernatorial primary in Arkansas, former Trump press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders gave a speech in which she proclaimed that, as governor, she will ensure that "when a kid is in the womb, they're as…Funny Stories Of Bad Dates With Jimmy Fallon! Tabs, Mon., June 27, 2022
7:00am By Rebecca SchoenkopfIt's a special howl in the wind all-Roe and SCOTUS tabs. Aren't you just the thrilledest?How they're criminalizing pregnancy — yes, even in progressive states, yes even by progressive prosecutors. Here's just one paragraph from a cascade of WTF paragraphs:…Wonkette Weekend Chat Begins A Cruel Summer With You
Sun 2:30pm By Robyn PennacchiaSummer’s here and while the time is usually right for dancing in the street, right now, it’s time for some seething white-hot rage directed at our Robed Masters on the Supreme Court.Today, we’re joined by special guest law-talker Jamie Lynn Crofts.…'Pro-Lifers' Respond To Abortion Rights Protests With Violence, Misogyny And Trucks
Sun 11:50am By Robyn PennacchiaIn much of the run-up to what we knew would be a whole lot of abortion rights protests following the death of Roe, right-wing pundits were clutching every pearl they could find and talking about how very terrified they were over how the left was probably going…Wonkette Movie Night: Clue
Sat 9:26pm By Robyn PennacchiaEnjoy! (And sorry, I scheduled it and it did not go up, although it is also possible I do not understand military time past 3pm)The Federalist: You're Not Hot For Marilyn Monroe, You're Hot For Traditional 1950s Morals
Sat 3:50pm By Robyn PennacchiaIf there is anything I learned working in a vintage shop, it is that Marilyn Monroe people are kind of annoying. By this I don't mean fans of her movies, but rather those who see her more as a "Choose Your Own Adventure" or "Rorschach test" icon, frequently…Right Wing A-Holes Threaten Veteran With Violence Until She Quits 4th Of July Parade
Sat 2:50pm By Robyn PennacchiaHaley Carter, a former professional soccer player and Marine who served several tours in Iraq who is also the chair of Houston Mayor Sylvester Turner's Commission Against Gun Violence, was supposed to be the grand marshal of the Friendswood, Texas 4th of July…Turns Out Ron Johnson May Have Told One Or Two Wee Fibs About Those Fake Electoral Certificates
Sat 1:00pm By Liz DyeOn Wednesday, the January 6 Select Committee revealed that Wisconsin Senator Ron Johnson tried to pass fake electoral certificates from Wisconsin and Michigan to Vice President Mike Pence on the day of the Capitol Riot.…The Absolute Last Thing We Needed: Q Is Back
Sat 12:15pm By Robyn PennacchiaThis whole week has been a steaming pile of hot garbage. People in many states across the country lost reproductive rights, the Miranda Warning got neutered, New York lost the right to restrict who can walk around with a concealed weapon, and California…Wonkette's Top Ten Stories Of The Week Are Hanging On 'Til Tomorrow
Sat 10:50am By Robyn PennacchiaHello!It's the weekend. Millions of people just lost their reproductive rights. And while we can't say that the sun will come out tomorrow, here is the "So You're Menstruating!" video we had to watch in 5th grade when the boys went outside to play baseball ...…Welcome to Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week's Cocktail, Sangria!
Fri 4:20pm By Matthew HooperGreetings, Wonketteers! I’m Hooper, your bartender. Summer’s still blazing. And dear Lord, do we need a drink. Let’s make a big pitcher of sangria. I’ve got a plan to crank out as much sangria as you need in no time flat and get back to the party.…Delicate Republican Flowers Cry That Maxine Waters And AOC Are Insurrectioning Them
Fri 3:57pm By Robyn PennacchiaWe are approximately 12 years into the House Select Committee January 6th hearings and people like Marjorie Taylor Greene and Andy Biggs are still not sure what anyone there did wrong (although they would like some pardons, please!). In honor of this feigned…'With Sorrow,' They Dissent.
Fri 2:20pm By Doktor ZoomFor a good sense of just how monumental a loss of freedom the Supreme Court's decision today is, look no further than the eloquent, furious dissent written jointly by Justices Elena Kagan, Stephen Breyer, and Sonia Sotomayor, which begins on page 148 of the…Joe Manchin Just Innocent Frog Who Gave Scorpions Kavanaugh And Gorsuch A Lift
Fri 1:51pm By Robyn PennacchiaYou know, the one thing one can say about Joe Manchin over Kyrsten Sinema is that at least he's honest about certain things. Sinema plays dress-up, pretends to care about abortion rights, LGBTQ rights, gun control and all kinds of other things — but just not…Hello! I, Super Lawyer Jeffrey Clark, Am Super Good At Lawyering!
Fri 1:22pm By Gary LegumGreetings, all. My name is Jeffrey Bossert Clark, and I am a serious lawyer.Stop laughing! Would an unserious lawyer be here giving the commencement address to his alma mater, the Ave Maria Sewer Tank Repair and Law School?That’s better. I was almost…That GOP Pardon List Getting Pretty Crowded With People Who Think They Didn't Do Anything Wrong
Fri 12:50pm By Liz Dye“I’ve decided that I should be on the pardon list, if that is still in the works,” coup-coup for Coco Puffs lawyer John Eastman emailed Rudy Giuliani after the Capitol Riot. And he wasn't the only one!At yesterday's House January 6 Select Committee…Burn It All Down.
Fri 12:22pm By Robyn PennacchiaRoe was overturned this morning.It feels so quiet. It's not that there's not any noise. I can hear birds and cars and other general noises, but somehow it's still just so fucking quiet. It's very hard to not feel hopeless and hard not to wish horrible things…Clarence Thomas's Magical Gun History Tour
Fri 10:55am By Doktor ZoomIn his Supreme Court opinion yesterday overturning New York's law requiring people to show they have a real need to carry a firearm, Clarence Thomas argues that there's only one standard necessary to decide whether gun laws are constitutional: Any regulation…SCOTUS: Police Officers Have Right To Remain Silent When It Comes To Miranda Warnings
Fri 9:20am By Robyn PennacchiaYou have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can be used against you in court. You have the right to talk to a lawyer for advice before we ask you any questions. You have the right to have a lawyer with you during questioning. If you cannot afford a…Everybody Pretty Sure Supreme Court Worthless, Illegitimate, Full Of Sh*t, Not Their Real Dad
Fri 8:56am By Evan HurstGood morning. Will the Supreme Court enshrine Sam Alito's one-handed misogyny scrawlings into law in the next hour and drop the ruling in Dobbs, the case that will overturn Roe v. Wade? Who knows! It's a decision day, though. (UPDATE: They did it. They fuckin'…
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